My decision to move to Boise

I was going over my past journal entries and found one I had written of my decision to move to Boise. Sadly, it wasn't written at the time I moved, but in retrospect a month later. I came upon it this morning and realized I hadn't finished writing down the complete experience, so I just tried to add what details I could remember. I have been reminded through this to record things of such important IMMEDIATELY after they happen!! :) Hopefully I can keep this fresh in my mind.

This is something extremely sacred to me, what I wrote. But, I feel it is for a good cause to post it here.

September 16, 2007
I was sitting in church today and realizing, repenting, of not keeping better record how the Lord has blessed me. Writing down those experiences is a way to show gratitude for how He has blessed you. I need to write a few things down now, while they are still fairly fresh in my mind. They are not as fresh as they could have been had I written them down closer to the actual events, which is something I will have to live with and make certain it doesn’t happen again.
Tomorrow I will hit the month mark for my move to Boise, Idaho. Time is an interesting concept as it feels as if it were only yesterday that I arrived here, yet, I feel like years have passed as so much has transpired since my arrival. I am writing this in hopes that I might always remember, remember what I felt in coming here and remember how the Lord has blessed me since. Remembering can be a powerful tool to help us not repeat mistakes we made in the past, or to keep in the forefront of our minds what is most important.

I came here to Boise back in June for my cousin’s wedding. There had been some other events that transpired prior to this trip that I won’t go into at this time in detail, but they had left me in a state of confusion and heartache indescribable with words. I had been unsure if I would attend the wedding with my parents because I had been crying and didn’t want to be a downer or any kind of distraction at their wedding. The night before, when I had gone to bed in tears, I decided that I wasn’t going to go and I would inform my parents in the morning of my decision. I would just stay home and have a nice relaxing weekend trying to get myself together. I arose in the morning, read my scriptures as usual, in my mind I was still deliberating on whether I should go. I have rarely felt such opposition in making a decision as I did that day. I don’t remember my decision to go on a mission ever being that conflicting to my soul or with such opposition. Looking back, I know that Satan was very aware of what was weighing on my trip that weekend and what decisions would be planted from me being in Idaho. I better understand a portion of what Joseph experienced and recorded in his life when he said “It seems though the adversary was aware, at a very early period of my life, that I was destined to prove a disturber and an annoyer of his kingdom; else why should the powers of darkness combine against me? Why the opposition (and persecution) that arose against me, almost in my infancy?” (JSH 1:20) I felt that Satan was very aware of the importance of me going to Boise and all that hinged on that decision. I was letting him have control somehow.

I informed my parents I wasn’t going to attend the wedding, that I didn’t want to be any kind of deterrent of happiness on Mike and Meagan’s wedding day. I still had my bags packed, as I was still riddled with unsure feelings of whether or not I should attend. I went back downstairs and sat on the bed, next to my bag-still packed to leave. My dad came quietly into the room and stood there for a moment. He then said in a small voice (I don’t remember the words exactly now) something to the effect that “You need to go. There is something important that is going to happen for you on this trip.” That is all he needed to say, as the Spirit confirmed that it was true. I said okay, and came upstairs with my things. On this trip is when I received the direction concerning my future. I found out about the number of refugees from war-torn countries that come here, coupled with migrant workers that are here-it filled me with excitement! While I was there, I had a really good, comfortable feeling there. So, when I returned home, I checked out the schools in the area, to see with all these refugees and workers if they had any bilingual/ESL programs. I checked Boise State University’s programs, and found they had one. They had a program that was Elementary Education-Bilingual/ESL. It had everything that I wanted! I was beginning to think the program for me did not exist, as I had been searching for years for the perfect one and hadn’t found it. Nothing ever felt completely right for one reason or another. This one did, so I applied and received word shortly after that I was accepted AND that they took all of my associate credits! Most places I checked, dissected all my classes and left me in digression in how far I had come. This one didn’t! I was so excited, and continued to push forward in making plans to move there: making appointment s with professors in my department, planning to come for orientation, etc. It was all falling into place, and feeling confirmation from the Holy Ghost that it was what I should be doing. When I was preparing to leave for Boise to attend the orientation meeting, I asked my father for a priesthood blessing. Heavenly Father, through my father, confirmed to me that the decision I had made was right and that I was to continue to push forward with the plans to move to Boise. This filled my heart to know-that those feelings I had had to up and make all these changes in my life were right-that God approved. It came at a very pivotal time in my life as well, where there was other turmoil in my life that I couldn’t understand and I was beginning to doubt that I understood how the Spirit spoke to me at all. This confirmed that I did, and that the Lord was ever mindful of me-in every detail. Of that I am forever grateful.